Okay forgive me for posting this on a Monday, must have been all the tryptophan in my system.
But even before Thursday's games I knew who I wanted to put as this week's Six Pack Sunday. There's a note saved in my iPhone with his name. And it is a great name. This week I'm giving all my attention to Cecil Shorts.
If this is your first time hearing of this guy, you're missing out. As you can see by, I don't know, his face...he's pretty hot. And just this week as I obviously planned, he had 4 catches for 105 yards and a TD. His name may be a little strange but he's fast and I hope he does well (just never against the Patriots). He just barely meets my 6' and taller rule so I'm sold. In case you need a little more persuasion, check out this video below of Cecil working out (ignore the other non muscle-y guys).
So I've officially been in what I like to call a Gronkpression for 2 full days now. I read one quote from Tedy Bruschi saying Vrabel missed 2 games with the same injury and now that's the only opinion I care to remember. Fuck the 4-8 weeks, we'll see you on Dec 10th, right Gronk? PLEASE?
Everyone needs to relax on blaming Belichick for leaving Gronk in the game because he was injured on a PAT (has that ever happened before?). Belichick may not be the most charismatic NFL personality but this is one of his more insightful analysis' of the situation:
“You only have so many players. You only dress so many players,” he said on WEEI Radio’s “Big Show.” ”Somebody’s got to play. I think you’ve got to be careful when you’re trying to run a team, to go up to one guy and say, ‘Michael, we’re going to leave you in the game because we care about you, but Glenn, we’re going to take you out because you’re really important. You other guys go in there because if something happens to you, we don’t really care.’
“Again, I think football players play football. I don’t know how — you tell me which guy is going to get hurt and I’ll get him out of there. I don’t know how you do that.”
This is exactly why the Patriots are the Patriots and not any other team in the NFL that doesn't win. Everyone keeps saying "Oh is Belichick's style hurting his players?" By hurting his players, do they mean winning? If I'm not mistaken Belichick is 116-45 with the Patriots and if you dare to bring up the 2 Super Bowls lost you are a terrible person. I do love the end of this quote though like can we trade for Tebow so he can tell us which players are going to get hurt and then he could heal them?
They did make the MNF crew discuss the Patriots "running up the score" and putting Gronk in the game late and of course, President of the I Hate the Patriots Fan Club, Cris Carter, had something to say. It's time to stop sipping your haterade Cris Carter and just accept the fact that the Patriots are good. Even Keyshawn was fighting against you. As Katt Williams would say...
But in my real world analysis of Gronk's injury, here's my theory. I remember distinctly watching the week 2 game against Arizona and after Aaron got hurt, they couldn't get anything going on offense. Besides the fact that the offensive line was atrocious, it seemed like the game plan was so obviously focused around Aaron that McDaniels and Belichick didn't have the playbook handy that had any other plays. I went to 2 of the practice sessions over the summer and noticed a heavy focus on featuring Aaron as the main offensive weapon, "matchup nightmare" if you will, this season. It looked like Tom and Aaron we're having sleepovers and working on some male bonding so that he'd be the best weapon on the team (taking a mental break to imagine this scenario in my head). What I'm getting to here is that there must be an entire playbook that runs the offense around Aaron. I know most of those plays probably involve Gronk since he had played 93% of offensive snaps all year but that's the reason we've signed 29 tight ends. I know it's impossible to replace Gronk and there's no way Shaincoe can bulk up like 50 lbs in time for Thursday but he's going to really have to step up if the Patriots have any chance of winning. It would also be nice if we could have Lloyd round into form and start catching some 40+ yard bombs that we've grown accustomed to seeing on the first drive of every game from the other team.
In other news, just heard that the Patriots offensive line got some type of award for their week 11 performance. Ladies and gentlemen, I think it's time to start thinking about Dante Scarnecchia for league MVP. In a game where the Patriots are without Logan Mankins and Dan Connolly you would never guess they'd win any type of award let alone keep Tom Brady on his feet all day. I know Philly and Chicago fans would trade head coaches for an offensive line coach as good as Dante Scarnecchia.
Last week I wrote about Danny Woodhead's performance and this week I want to point out Rob Ninkovich. BTW I just Wikipedia'd him and who would have ever guessed he was of Croatian descent? The man has 6 sacks and 5 forced fumbles in 10 games this season. For everyone saying the Patriots don't have any pass rushers, look no further than Jet Killer Rob Ninkovich. He might not be Demarcus Ware or Aldon Smith but he is a playmaker. Another Patriot success story of a 5th round draft pick who floated around on practice squads and released by many teams who finally finds a home here in New England. It's cause to Bill, all players are equally important and everyone gets a chance. Hopefully in a few weeks I'll get to write about Talib and how great he is (fingers crossed). Mixed feelings on his first performance as a Patriot but since we hadn't seen a pick 6 in an eternity, I'll let him pass this week.
Love Kraft sitting next to Henry Kissinger at this week's game. One week it's Steven Tyler, Bon Jovi, then Henry Kissinger. Some owners have people wiping their glasses, other owners have Nobel Peace Prize winners.
This week I've got the luxury of watching the 1pm Jets Rams game (CBS you couldn't have found one game better than this??) Actually, I take that back. It's kind of nice to get to watch the Jets for a full game instead of just getting to see the lowlights on SportsCenter all week.
But this Six Pack Sunday is not about the Jets. Honestly I'm not sure there is actually one Jet I could feature anyway since mostly things like this come out of the Jets locker room:
Okay seriously this week's Six Pack Sunday is devoted to Danny AMENdola. Now you know my heart belongs with another under 6" undrafted Texas Tech Red Raider wide receiver/returner but I have to admit, this guy is not only pretty good but also pretty.
I guess I have a thing for underdogs in pro sports because it seems like these guys are nicer and I'm basing this completely on physical appearance. Although he doesn't follow my strict 6" and taller rule, the scruff and charming smile makes me reconsider (Wes you are still my #1).
The similarities between Danny and Wes, besides their short stature and boyish good looks, are extensive. Apart from their football background which I just mentioned, both guys are premiere slot receivers, can return punts/kicks, and have a really high football IQ. Neither guy wants to be a celebrity more than he'd rather be a great NFL player and that is a part of what makes them both so attractive. Another thing I find attractive about Danny Amendola is this look. AMENdola it is.
But the biggest turn on for me is how tough these guys are. You might think that being under 6" and under 200 lbs might be make them frequently on the sideline or easy to break but it's hard for me to even name any player as tough as Danny Amendola and Wes Welker. This year, Amendola broke his collarbone and was expected to be out 6-8 weeks but miraculously was back in the game in less than a month (again similar to Wes Welker who tore his ACL at the end of the 2009-2010 season and was back for training camp the next year, never missing a beat). You'll never hear either of these guys complain and there's nothing hotter than that. Except maybe this, an actual six pack sighting on Six Pack Sunday. Enjoy, ladies (and guys...take notes)
I think my heart rate is finally low enough for me to be able to think about this week of football. Every week I look forward to watching what the Evil Empire will come up with on offense and who is going to have a big day (usually it's Wes). This week we got to see a lot of Danny O'Woodhead. I love that little nugget. Seems like this is what the Patriots are best at, plucking undrafted agents from the rugby team (no really, we did that this year) and making them into your kid's favorite player. How do you hate players like Danny Woodhead? He's a perfect Patriot. Overlooked, hardworking, team player, does what they ask and succeeds. Which is exactly why the Jets let him go. Too quiet, intelligent and far too lovable. Rex hates guys like that.
I think it took about 3 offensive snaps Sunday to get my fix of watching Wes get slaughtered. Like, can't we send an extra offensive lineman out there to block him so that doesn't happen anymore? I don't think it would be a Patriots game without me having to ask someone if he's alive at least once.
Anyone else think they've got the replacement TV programmers working this year? I feel like we've heard every random "yo mama" and "fuck you bitches" that's been said this year.
Something else we saw this week that was not really meant for children was this:
Poor Eric Frampton but more importantly, poor everyone who saw that. Not the first time we've seen an asshole in a Dallas Cowboys uniform.
Things I don't look forward to seeing from the Patriots every week: defense. It had been going okay, and I realize as I say this that they had been on a bye last week. They had not been embarrassing in that game in London so I think it gave us all a little hope. I'll say it again, I don't care if Aqib Talib kills kittens, if the guy can play corner I want him on my team. They were atrocious this week. I think my dog could tackle Fred Jackson better than the Patriots defense did on Sunday. When the Bills were in the red zone with like :43 seconds left in the game I really believed it was over. I'd seen the movie before and every time so far, it's ended with a loser QB throwing to a wide open receiver in the end zone for the win. This time it wasn't and that's about it. Not sure how a team can flirt with the record of the most penalty yards in a game and still have the chance to win the game? I'm just glad they are closing these games with a win even if it is as uglier than Honey Boo Boo's mom.
Oh, and a Harvard kid calls someone a "punk"? Is anyone surprised? By the way, that's exactly what I want people calling a linebacker on my team. I don't want Fitzpatrick saying post game "You know, that Brandon Spikes is such a sweetheart!" That's what he's paid to do, be a punk. I'm really glad to have him and I think he has the opportunity to be a Rodney Harrison-type Patriot.
Just when you think everything is falling apart in the NFL, the teams that are normally good come to the forefront...
I need a few more hours to process my basketball thoughts. It's been a few normal, crazy days here in Laker
Land. The Lakers are the only team anyone is talking about in the NBA....
I know this is late but for all you party animals out there still up watching tonight's Sunday Night Football game, Six Pack Sunday is here for you.
Tonight's honoree is Arian Foster, running back for the Houston Texans. Everyone knows how I feel about men with tattoos but he's definitely one of my faves. He seems like the perfect blend of swag and romance if that makes sense to anyone else but me. I wish there were more like him. How can you not love a man that can be as funny as this:
The past week was election week, so I've been spending a lot of time thinking what life would be like if Bill Belichick was president...and to be honest, I don't think it's actually a bad idea. There's no way any other country would know any American secrets and I don't think anyone would actually try and fuck with us. I mean, who cares if the guy can't figure out how to set the clock in his car, he can win football games. I'm assuming Brady would be VP so that's even better.
Seriously though, I don't want to talk politics but what's hotter than a President who knows football? Hearing Obama talk about Charles Tillman for Defensive POY was such a turn on.
It's been so long since the Patriots played a game I've almost gone into hibernation. I haven't seen Wes Welker get beheaded in what feels like a year. But a lot sure has happened. Baby Hernandez was born and it's still a little fresh. I had been pushing it out of my mind but I guess it really was true. Whatever, I'll make a great stepmom...I've seen the movie enough times.
Lamar called himself a Laker. Hey, am I surprised? No. I imagine he spends many cold nights in the corner of Khloe's huge closet wiping his tears away with his old Laker jersey eating Twizzlers. Love you Lam Lam.
Lakers fired Mike Brown. I didn't like him as the head coach in the first place so I can't really say I'm too upset about it but if Phil Jackson comes back I literally might believe in God. I have a thing for Hall of Fame head coaches, OK? I think Phil Jackson coming back to the Lakers would cure all of my problems. Kobe needs to go out on top, and it has to happen now. If Phil loves Kobe nearly half as much as I do, he would come back just to finish the legacy. Come on Jeanie, just hold out for a few days and tell Phil he's not getting any until he signs the deal. Although he is the Zen Master so I'm not sure how great that plan is.
Let's hope things are better in Laker Land before Feb 7th...
